Posts Tagged ‘Ceramics’

Sunny Monday

// June 15th, 2010 // No Comments » // Animals, HIV and AIDS, Me Time

one year 006Ok I don’t know if it was me and my headache, but after getting home from an awesome day of being out and about with Dodger, I sat on the sofa and this God awful headache took over which made my awesome day a complete pain in the head. Before I knew it I was in so much pain all I could do was sit and try to let it pass. I took some Excedrin, you know, the headache medicine and not long I was able to relax. I was in bed and sleep before the sun set. This was cool because I am sure Dodger was pretty tired from three days of walking over to West Hollywood.

Going to bed before the sunset can sometimes be a good thing, but there is always the chance that you walk up and this is what happened to me. At 1:30AM I woke up and could not go back to sleep. So I got up played with Dodger and then decided to blog. After finishing the blog my website went crazy and I was not able to save or post it. This really drove me crazy, but I wasn’t too upset because since Ryan created the website over two years ago I have never had a problem with it. I can say the same thing about my blog as well so I just took it all in stride and counted it as a practice blog.

Monday was my third day at the ceramics studio, as I stated before, it was also day threeone year 009 of walking to the studio, so I got three awesome days of walking in the heat. I think I’ve blogged before that I have fallen off from my gym schedule. I have only been one time since my trip to DC. I really can’t blame it on anyone or anything other then me. So the walking has been good for me.

When I got to the studio Brian had a bag of clothes for me and I am was happy. I’ve talked about what I do, but have never asked any of the guys to contribute anything, so to have Brian offer a bag of gently used clothes was so awesome. I always get so blown away when people do things like this. The bag was filled with really nice casual shirts which I will use for my outreach on Skid Row for people who are battling HIV or AIDS.

It was another really cool day at the studio and I am so glad that I took the time to make it there for three days. It is really a great way for me to clear my head and take time out for me. Plus I get to be in the company of some really cool people, many of which are friends of mine.

one year 017It was a perfect way to end an awesome weekend that I spent with my friend and Dodger. Once I returned home I also had a cool surprise in the mail. I emailed this shoe company to let them know the quality of the shoe laces the put in their dress shoes. I was surprised when i got an email back in a few days and even more surprised that after a few weeks I got a new pair of laces in the mail.

It’s Tuesday and I going to the gym today. In fact I am going all week and I will also take my little boy out for his long walks as well.

Gay Pride Parade

// June 14th, 2010 // 3 Comments » // Animals, HIV and AIDS, Homeless Outreach, Me Time

LA Pride Parade 2010 044As I stated in an earlier blog, I had no plans to attend any of the Gay Pride Festival events, because being gay is such a small part of who I am, however I did have plans to go to the Pride Parade on Sunday with my friends and Dodger. It was great and I am glad I went.

For me the Pride Parade really had nothing to do with “pride in being gay”, but just a chance to hang out with me friends and see a parade. Hey it’s Los Angeles and it seems like there is some sort of parade every single weekend in some city here. The only parade that really means much to me is the Rose Parade in Pasadena for the Rose Bowl football game. To me that parade really represents the awesomeness of Southern California and all her sheer beauty. When USC is in the Rose Bowl it is even better.

There aren’t many floats in this parade, just lots of men barley dressed bumping andLA Pride Parade 2010 201grinding and slinging their cocks threw their too small underwear at the crowd. There are a few celebs, but it is Los Angeles, so there has to be some celebs otherwise you can’t really call it a parade. I think those are the rules, because otherwise it is just a bunch of people marching in the street.

Sharon and Kelly Osborn were the Grand Marshals of the parade, but for me the real star was Sheryl Lee Ralph who was part of the original cast of Dream Girls and the mom on smash hit Moesha. She is also a huge ally, fundraiser and supporter of HIV and AIDS. It was great seeing her in the parade.

We took in the sounds and all the many different wild, crazy and even the strange sights of the parade right in front of Gelson’s. My friends Tina, Willow, Andy and Eric along with my little boy Dodger enjoyed out time together. The bonus was that I had the chance to see my friends Donald, Walter and Angel from the outreach I created down of Skid Row for people living with HIV or AIDS. The chance to laugh and see them having a great time and really enjoying life was so cool for me. It is always such an awesome feeling to see them smiling and having a great time outside the crazy and drab life that Skid Row has to offer. Donald was filled with plenty of smiles and laughs just like always and as always Walter was sexy and nice as ever.

LA Pride Parade 2010 245The highlight of the entire day for me was the fact that I was able to share the ceramics studio with my friends. I guess in a huge way this place is the center of “Pride” for me because it is the place that hold so much and is the start of so much for me. It was one place where I felt safe and where I could just be me. It was also the one place where I felt respected, welcomed and loved and today the ceramics studio still holds so much for me. It was so cool to be able to share this with my friends.

After the parade Dodger and I went to the studio to spend the rest of our afternoon playing in the clay and making some pretty cool pieces. Well I really didn’t create any new pieces, but worked on the one I started the day before. Once again I have found that I am pretty good at sculpting. When I first started going to the studio this is what I did the most of, I was able to put whatever I was feeling into the clay and this energy helped me to create some really awesome pieces.

As I have stated before, many of the guys at the studio are people who are so special andLA Pride Parade 2010 053 kind and I am so honored and humbled to call them my friends. Brian, Glen, and Robert are always so much fun and such solid people to be around. Plus they are such great artists. They are also such huge inspirations to me and great examples of what life can be like and how awesome it really is for people who happen to be HIV positive.

People tell me all the time that I inspire them and how awesome I am for finding a way to create some good out of the adversity in my life. I am always humbled by the comments like this, but to be very honest it is people like my friends, the guys at the studio and people who really put forth an honest effort to be better and stand in the gap for others who are the inspirations for me. They are the people I see as fine examples in my life who demonstrate each day what it means to live life to the fullest, how to give to others without expecting anything in return, what it means to love and support someone unconditionally and this in turn encouraged me to be a better person and keep doing the work that I’ve created.

LA Pride Parade 2010 247So I guess for me my “Gay Pride” is more about simply being proud of the people I have in my life, celebrating the richness of my friendships, embracing, loving and living life as best I can each and every day without fail in good times and bad, through the storms, through the fire, the highs and lows I must always strive to rise to every occasion and get past every challenge as best I can and remember to always show love and compassion towards humanity along the way.

Pride for me was about being proud, but not because I am gay.

“90-365” Celebrate “Pride”

// June 12th, 2010 // 1 Comment » // Animals, Me Time

New Day 003I don’t know if I’ve blogged this before or not, but just in case I didn’t, here we go. Not long ago my friend Jacque created this challenge of sorts on YOUTUBE to “love yourself” first for 90 days. I met some really interesting people while doing this challenge, but the cool thing is that along the way, I met two more amazing women who are now part of my circle of friends, Audrey and Darlyna.

Just as we all were nearing the end of the 90 days each of us had life jump right in and start kicking our asses and our finishes were not as strong as our starts. However we all finished. Not long after I asked the ladies to join me on what we now call “90-365” and each of them did. There were also others who’ve said they do the challenge as well, but I think it is something that all three of us share the most.

No sooner then we started up again, life stepped in again and tried to work against us. For me I was faced with having to move my blog from the ning platform over to my website. This was a lot of work and came at a time when I was preparing for a trip to Washington DC for AIDSWatch. In addition two people I thought were friends turned out to be anything but. Just like ning, these two individuals are a part of my past and I must admit that I don’t miss them at all.

About two weeks ago I made the choice to take a break from my vlog on YOUTUBE, however before doing this I had to wonder how many people who say they are my friends and care so much about me, would really be just that. Just as I thought not many of them have been in contact since I’ve taken the break.

For the past two weeks I’ve been spending more with my family and friends, I’ve beenChillin and Doing Something 064working on my website and spending lots more time with Dodger. I am also back to creating things in the ceramic studio again. The coolest thing has been the time that I am able to spend reading, walking and just chilling. I have to tell you that it has been great not having to log on to YOUTUBE. It’s funny how many people on YOUTUBE feel that when they comment, you must answer them or that they some how own stock in your videos and therefore you must make them.

This entire time off from YOUTUBE has been about ME and my community work. Dodger and I am going on walks many times a day and for the past two days we’ve been going on really long walks that have included lunches in the park and hikes in the hills, Just seeing how happy Dodger gets when he sees me grabbing my shoes is such a great feeling to me. he knows when I make my move for the shoes it’s just about time for us to take off.

New Day 009Today is Saturday, the beginning of Gay Pride and I had plans to hang out and spend the weekend with a friend who was supposed to be in town, but plans changed and she was not able to come into town. However I am kind of glad she didn’t come to town, because I really didn’t want to go to Gay Pride. I guess I just don’t get what Gay Pride is all about, so I don’t see a reason to celebrate. I know who I am and I love who I am, so I don’t need to march or wear some rainbow to show my pride toward something. I guess what I am saying is that for me pride is everyday and has nothing to do with being gay. Just like HIV, being gay is such a SMALL part of who I am and I refuse to be defined by it.

Today I got before the sun, made some coffee and breakfast, bacon, two scrambled eggs and two slices of grilled sourdough bread. I took Dodger out foe our first walk and then the plan was to start my laundry, but the laundry room was packed, so that was out of the question. I instead cleaned my apartment and took the trash out. I watched a bit of TV. It wasn’t long before I got a call from my friend Travis, he too is someone I met through YOUTUBE and is also someone I consider one of my friends. It’s funny that he would be calling because not more then two minutes before I sent him a HELLO on Twitter. He too is on a break from YOUTUBE and was the first to welcome me to “hiatus-ville”  The last time we talked was so much fun and filled with so much laughter. Today was short and sweet, but still filled with laughs. Like Jacque, Audrey and Darlyna, Travis is one of those people I so wished lived closer because I know we’d be even better friends.

After talking with Travis I was put my shoes back on and decided to take a walk withNew Day 013Dodger. I knew it would be one of our explore walks, but I had no idea where we were walking to or how far it would be. Before I knew it Dodger and I had walked to West Hollywood and since we were there we kept going until we reached the ceramic studio.

I was so surprised to walk back and find that there was no one there besides Robert and Alan. I saw Glen on my way in as he was leaving. In that moment I was so that there were not many people there. Soon after arriving Alan left and for most of four hours I was there Robert and I spent laughing and working on our pieces while Dodger played in the tall grass.

5:00PM came quick and it was time for us to head home. Robert walked with Dodger and I for a bit before he took off on his bike. Dodger and I walked through Plumber Park where he found some dogs to play with for a bit them we continued our walk home. Once back home I started my laundry, gave Dodger a bath, baked some chicken for dinner, shaved, cleaned my face, soaked on a hot bubble bath and then watched TV.

New Day 016When I started the “90-365” journey this time around I knew things in my life were going to change. I knew people in my life were going to change and I was very cool with that. My only request was that God allowed people and things that were true to remain. I asked that distractions be removed even if that meant people who I wanted to hang on to would no longer be there. Today I celebrated “pride” by being happy with where my life is. I celebrated the people and things that are no more and I am welcoming the extra space.

A Day To Chill

// June 7th, 2010 // 1 Comment » // Animals, HIV and AIDS, Me Time

Ceramics 004Today was Monday which means a sweet day to relax and enjoy. Dodgers poop was much better after our morning walk, so I was really happy about that, plus he seemed to have his swagger back in his walk. This was awesome because I really wanted to go to the ceramic studio today, but if my little buddy wasn’t back to normal then I was just going to chill around the apartment with him.


Most Monday’s I spend the day doing ceramics with other guys who are either HIV positive or have AIDS. I was told about this place shortly after being diagnosed from someone who reads my blog and watches my YOUTUBE channel. They saw a blog where I was talking about how support groups just didn’t seem to work for me and being part of social networks where the main focus is centered around HIV and all the members only blog or vlog about HIV also didnt work for me. Especially since more the 90% of the people were acting like victims or how their lives are some how now screwed up and over. For me that isn’t support and it certainly isn’t something that I consider to be healthy or something I want to be around. Now I am sure these settings work for some people, I am just not one of them and from what I am learning from some many people who are HIV positive, this setting doesnt work for them either.


Dodger and I left home about 12:00PM walking to West Hollywood. I am notCeramics 001 sure how far it is, but I think it is about 6 miles round trip, maybe a little more. It’s June, so we are experiencing what is called “June Gloom” which means there is a marine layer that hangs around most of the morning and then it burns off giving way for the beautiful California sun. The walk was awesome and along the way Dodger was able to mingle with other dogs and explore. I was able to get some much needed exercise in.


When I walked down the walkway toward the back yard I started thinking about the pieces I created the last time I was there and how they should be ready to take home. Once I got in the back yard I was greeted with smiles and hello’s from the guys. Monday’s are cool at the studio because there aren’t as many guys as Saturday and Sunday and the guys who come are very chill and there is never any catty drama. I also happen to think the most creative guys come on Monday’s.


Ceramics 012Just like I had hoped for, my pieces were done and ready for me to take home, but what was really cool was the fact that they looked amazing and this made me very happy. Sometimes when I glaze I am not happy with the finished looked, but this time I was blown away buy how they came out. This was now the second time I was really pleased with the finished product. This gave me the energy to create some new pieces and this is exactly what I did.


I spent the afternoon in the company of some really cool guys creating some really cool pieces over some awesome conversation and the focus was not HIV or moaning and groaning about being HIV positive. It was simply a good of guys who share having HIV, but our passion for life and art is greater then allowing HIV or AIDS to control, derail, slow down or end the amazing lives each of us still has.


Just like always I left feeling happy that I took time out for me and the fact thatCeramics 006 I had the chance to spend the afternoon with some really cool guys making some awesome art. Dodger had the chance to play in this huge yard where he could explore and play in tall grass, chase cats and squirrels and then lay in the sun to nap. Our walk home was slow and steady. Once again, Dodger explored, mingled with other dogs and enjoyed his time with me and I was able to once again get some much needed exercise in.